First edition of Spilling Tea with Samantha and Dr. B! Let me know what you think. Did we answer any of your questions? What additional questions do you have? Let me know if the comments, either here or on YouTube!
Check out Samantha Heuwagen at her website, twitter, or instagram!
Thanks for watching!
Margaret Sanger (1879-1966) was an amazing woman who lived in an age of upheaval for women and the sexual experiences of human beings. She was one of the originators of the birth control movement, an original sex educator, writer, and nurse. One of her crowing achievements was to found the American Birth Control League, which eventually morphed into what is Planned Parenthood today. As a massive feminist, she is an inspiration to many and deserves incredible respect.
At 37, she started the first birth control clinic to operate in the United States. She believed that helping women to control their reproductive rights would lead to social change; specifically, the further equalization of the biological genders. These thoughts - repugnant for our society in early and mid 20th century - led to her consistent persecution and legal battles under the Comstock Act, and in the media. Nevertheless, #ShePersisted. As a matter of fact, she lived to see the triumphant defeat and repeal of the Comstock Act, one year before she passed, in 1965.
She believed in positive sexual expression - being influenced by Havelock Ellis; yet opposed excessive sexuality and thought that masturbation could be dangerous (due to her work with compulsive sexuality as a nurse). She was a proponent of positive sexual identity, believing even in the early 1900's that a gay identity is, "a thing that a person is born with." She helped to encourage the development of the first birth control pill, Enovid, by Gregory Pincus by asking philanthropist Katharine McCormick to give him funding for his research. And, she actively fought for the freedom of speech and that everyone has an equal right to be heard and to speak their mind. All women, and our society, owe her a debt of gratitude in helping us to take some steps to get where we are today.
She was bad ass, and advanced for her time. She was visionary... legendary.
Want to read more about Margaret Sanger? Check out these legit links:
How False Narrative of Margaret Sanger are Being Used to Shame Black Women
The Margaret Sanger Papers Project
PBS: People & Events, Margaret Sanger
Do you know what the clitoris is? Do you know where it is? ALL OF IT? What we used to think of as the clitoris is actually just one small, external (albeit very sensitive) portion of a much larger and more complex tissue structure that we are only just now getting to know about.
(image credit: Mail & Guardian Women, 2015)
The #GetCliterate movement is attempting to provide information and education on exactly what the clitoris looks like, and how you can begin to get to know it better - and thereby have a more fulfilling sex.
This is what the clitoris actually looks like;
So that little “nub” that you see at the top of a vulva (please, please, tell me you’ve seen it before!) is just the beginning. The clitoris is actually an amazing organ that extends down, encircling the vaginal canal, and even has little wings that extend outward. It is quite the beautiful organ. Where the all the parts come together, just below the glans clitoris, before it splits to go around the vagina, is where many scholars believe is the “g-spot” location, as it will be the crux of where the different tissues merge - thereby being a sensitive location. Specifically, it is directly about 2 inches or so inside the vagina, on the top of the canal - and can often be felt by someone paying attention to subtle differences in texture.
When there is something stimulating inside the vagina, it is contracting, moving, and stimulating this larger clitoral organ. In conjunction with the concentration of nerve endings in the glans clitoris an orgasm occurs - however, orgasm can occur by stimulating each of these areas separately as well.
Some other interesting facts about the clitoris:
Check out HuffingtonPost’s Cliteracy Project Website to learn more! Tune in later for more tips on how to stimulate this amazing organ for more pleasure!
International Women's Day 2017 was March 8, 2017 - that day, and all days, we should celebrate the accomplishments, efforts, and the existence of strong, beautiful women around the world
As a self-identified cisgender male, I stood in solidarity with my female identified colleagues, friends, family, and strangers across the globe in doing what I could to bring about awareness and advance egalitarian ideals on this day. There were four ways in which international organizers suggested to participate in Women's day 2017: 1; don't go to work (paid or unpaid) on this day 2; stay off social media 3; wear red 4; reserve purchases on this day for only women-owned small businesses. I was able to participate in all except number 1 - I had to go to work, but I was proudly supporting red colors, staying off social media and did not make any purchases during this time (partly because I didn't need to go to any stores).
Let's not retain or reserve the celebration of women around the globe to one day. Let's strive to make EVERY DAY International Women's Day - and fight for equality and women's rights everywhere.
Definitely might be overthinking this one...
Spoiler alert: We all masturbate! Even if we do it in the presence of a loving partner, if you are a person who engages in sexual activity, we have all masturbated at some point, in some way. Masturbation is the process of self-pleasuring in a sexual manner to elicit an arousing and satisfying response.
I was thinking about how a common theme of our society is that boys are "crude" and "vulgar" and mimic masturbation signals when 'cat-calling' women or when joking around with each other. They frequently talk about masturbation with each other - and between partners. However, for women, this is often not true - masturbation is hardly ever brought up - and if it is, it is definitely not boisterously or - heaven forbid - openly discussed in public. So, that got me thinking - is female masturbation oppressed by our heteropatriarchal society?
... and then after I thought that I immediately said, "of course it is." - So you can stop with your sass! Of course, our society has historically (and consistently) been obsessed with making sure that women's sexuality is repressed. Even when the vibrator was initially invented it was never seen as a sexual tool or toy; instead it was a medical instrument to cure a disease! (To 'cure' hysteria - and used by medical doctors on women to bring them to 'paroxysm' [orgasm] which would alleviate symptoms.) It simply wasn't truly believed that women even had orgasms for the longest time. Even now, we are only -literally- just beginning to fully understand the female genital anatomy! Only within the previous 20-30 years have we uncovered the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the true shape and scope of the clitoris.
So... why have we consistently, and constantly repressed female sexuality? And to this day - we continue to repress this sexuality through the ongoing message that masturbation is somehow wrong or inappropriate for women. WHY!? Why on Earth is this still a thing!? Why is it 'OK' or 'acceptable' albeit with a tinge of gross-out for boys and men to joke around about masturbation or sex, but when a woman does it - it's not the same? Why is she "nasty" and he is "funny?"
Sexual double standards...
Ingrained beliefs rooted in oppression...
Beliefs of propriety...
I don't think this is a question that will be answered through overthinking it. I also know this question has been posed by many more thoughtful and articulate people before me - and I love their work. As for me, I believe it is due to power and control - and the subjugation of women in our society, culture, and history. This is one more thing men have robbed women of; for shame.
What are your thoughts?
This page is a blog and repository of Dr. B - a sex therapist, educator, researcher, activist and speaker. Interested in all things sexual, social justice, LGBTQQIA+, and mental health.