This is a new, recurring, segment on the sex+ blog. It will include a "mini" or small piece of sex advice that is directly relatable to many people, hopefully in many contexts. ;-)
Make Sex FUN Again! Ever heard the statement, "out of sight, out of mind?" The same thing applies to your sex! Many people and couples tend to have hot 'n heavy introductions to their sexuality. After a while most people's sex life tends to fall off, dipping to a low point that many couples just accept as the normal progression of their intimacy. Sometimes life events (vacations, celebrations, etc.) will provide the energy needed to dust-off libidos and provide a little boost to creativity, but most couples report that their sex life "returns to normal" after a little while. I pose the question - what is normal? Maybe, just maybe, your sex life's "normal" can be those high points! Most people report in sex therapy that when a therapist tells them to have more sex, it becomes a chore - repetitive, not fun, and unimaginative. When I work with my clients I never tell them they have to have sex... the get to have sex! Part of what will increase your desire will be having your various sex-related (and even some not typically related) sexual paraphernalia ready and poised. Try keeping your favorite sex toys, lubes, condoms, or erotica on your bedside table - directly in eyesight. Just the visual representation may get you in the mood, and remind you of all the fun you used to have!
Note: If you happen to live in a home with others (kids, parents, nosy houseguests, etc.) you can easily keep your favorite items in the top bedside drawer, or a handy and complimentary "treasure chest" that will blend with your decor.
Enjoy... and keep sexin'!
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On this site, you will find Dr. B's blog, information on how to book Dr. B for trainings, supervision, or therapy, his current research, and many educational materials!
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